We were surprised to have our cable and internet services restored last night, only to blink off for the rest of the evening, back on again today. Our power has done that too - several times we've heard transformers blown as others are being added back online...things just ain't too normal down here in the gulf coast...
But today I tried to find a little normality at one of the local quilt shops! Cactus Quilts in Texas City did not have damages from Ike and today was celebrating the 6th anniversary with a sale - what a wonderful opportunity to be out and about among quilting friends and playing in fabric! I even won a door prize!A 5 1/2 inch square up ruler from Omigrip - one of the few rulers I don't already own (smile) Thank you Carla!
It was good to be among friends, to hug necks, to hear first hand experiences of how folks fared Ike. One of the ladies had heart wrenching photos from Galveston, another had the opportunity to be on the island and aide in the clean up of our other local quilt shop, Quilts By the Bay - which had over 2 feet of water in the shop. Learned that one of the other local quilt shops in La Porte, Painted Pony N Quilts, lost their roof and had water damage. Neither of these shops have reopened yet - both are regular vendors at the Houston International Quilt Show, which is just 5 weeks away. It's unreal to even try to image the work they have ahead of them.
I really hate to admit this, but I'm struggling in this transition of trying to find a new normal. Please don't think I've lost faith or am ungrateful for my blessings, but there is something to be said about survivor guilt - I've heard others struggle with feeling guilty over having power when their neighbors did not and such. There's just so much that's unsettled around here that it's hard to really wrap your brain around it. And it doesn't go away after a good night's sleep. I'm not depressed or distraught, can't even say I'm discouraged, but something's just not right. The world around me has crashed and everyone is trying to find a new normal. Life as we've known it has changed. Change is inevitable - change happens all the time whether we want it to or not - simple changes like kids growing up, getting older, having loved ones pass from this life to the next...there are so many changes in life that are simply a part of life. But this happened suddenly, drastically.
Deep down I know things will be on an even kilter once again, but things will never be the same, it will be new and hopefully better, just not the same. And the hard part-- there's a long road between here and there.
My favorite "escape" from reality has always been a nice visit to Galveston to walk on the seawall, have lunch with my husband at one of our favorite establishments, visiting the quilt shop, going to quilt guild meetings...all that is on temporary hold right now - and I don't know for how long. I guess I'm missing having an escape - I don't know where to go to find my refreshment, my shot in the arm to keep me going...even the quilt sale didn't chase away my blues...I want to cry but the tears don't come - just a waste of energy if the truth be told.
This too shall pass. I've heard that all my life, been through many trials and storms to know it's true. My trust is in my Lord, that hasn't changed - for although things in life do change, He never does. His love is amazing. I'm just hoping He'll help me work through this and restore my joy. I know this is not a time to quit or give up. Maybe this is a time to just rest and refuel. There will be a new normal, there always is. It just the transition part that I've finding long and tiring (smile).
Maybe I should just go play in my fabric (double grin). Festival will be here soon, that's something to look forward to. Always good to have something to look forward too! Even if it's just a nice dinner out - my husband called at lunch today to say he noticed our favorite Mexican place had power as he drove to work - I betcha anything he takes me out tonight! A great way to chase away the blues!!
This is truly a time for friends and neighbors. One of my customers just left and had said how Texans were true neighbors lending a helping hand to one another. There are hundreds of these stories all around...yet it sure felt good to get a hug and know that I'm not the only one all tensed up with the stress of what has happened to our area. Everyone is feeling it I guess. Wish I could just crawl under a rock, sleep like Rip Van Winkle, and awaken to that new normal without having to struggle to get there...but that's not reality is it? That's a selfish attitude and doesn't show much faith...
Too much thinkin' goin' on - it's past time to go play in my fabric. Maybe I can focus and work on something that not only makes me smile but gives me something cheerful to write about.